orgygami: when theres a long intro before a music video
me everyday: today is not my day
snorlaxatives: jamie lynn spears better hope i don’t catch her ass on the streets she’s dead to me for getting zoey 101 cancelled
talaem: “don’t be shy” thanks u cured me
cowboybeboop: viste: cowboybeboop: reblog if u were on tumblr before yahoo bought it IT’S LITERALLY BEEN LIKE A DAY AND WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TRYING TO ACHIEVE WITH THIS POST only a true tumblrite would understand. you just outed yourself as a yahooligan
gamsee: my whole life is just “oh ok”
tempoes: everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold
When you were younger and a friend came round
sodamnrelatable: The awkward first half hour of politeness: The next couple of hours: When their parents came to collect them: “HIDE! HIDE! THEY CAN’T TAKE YOU IF THEY CAN’T FIND YOU! IN MY ROOM! THEY WILL NEVER FIND YOU THERE! HIDE NIGGA HIDE! THIS IS A MATTER OF LIFE OR DEATH!”
oomshi: I just saw 3 girls walk by a water fountain, pull out their phone & scream “INSTAGRAM WORTHY”
yesimbeyonce: me at your funeral
sodamnrelatable: Expectation: Reality:
Overhearing a conversation between strangers in...
Now you know giant anteater's front legs look like...
vanehwasreal: macaronrainbow: tatermo: I keep looking at it, and it keeps confusing me i don’t know how to deal with this information
I was hungry so I bought some animal crackers at...
Cashier guy: ok that will be 1.39
Me: uh can I get a bag too please?
Cashier guy: *gives me a weird look but hands me a small bag*
Me: thank you I think people might look at me funny if they see me walking around the mall with animal crackers you know
Cashier guy: what just be like "YEH I LIKE ANIMAL CRACKERS AND WHAT"
Cashier guy (as I'm leaving): DON'T LET THE HATERS BRING YOU DOWN YOU EAT THOSE ANIMAL CRACKERS GIRL
If there is a God, He will have to beg my forgiveness.– A phrase that was carved on the walls of a concentration camp cell during WWII by a Jewish prisoner. (via housewaifu)
nevvzealand: thinking about my homework is probably as far as im gonna get with it
do you ever just rub your eyes so hard that you just start entering some other fucking galaxy of swirls and patterns
richwhitelesbian: we need some new and more powerful swears